In a shocking and heartbreaking development, especially for young people in countries such as Iran and Iraq, it has been discovered that Steve Jobs’ most popular invocation to the youth actually came with a big previously unknown rider: ‘Follow Your Passion – Only applicable to citizens of developed nations‘!
This gut-wrenching revelation was discovered in his secret personal diary which had been hidden under his working table all this while and was discovered recently.
Millions of his followers experienced heartbreak when they read his explanation for the rider,
“If everybody started following their passion, who will wash the dishes man? I mean, the Mexicans don’t have a passion for delivering pizzas, that too ‘ON’ time. The Indians don’t dream of driving cabs around New York City. The Chinese can’t even figure out their passions, they are too busy copying already discovered passions.”
Steve’s followers reacted how a mother would take negative feedback about her beloved son. They strongly criticised ‘#paid_media’ for spreading such rumours. In a unanimous statement released to the press they said, “We could never imagine that the corporate lobby will go to such an extent to demean Steve Jobs, just so that we continue working in their jobs. Steve had given us everything – inspiration and direction, which helped us handle the frustration of always being short of a little money all the f***ing time but thanks to him we always asked why the hell we needed all that money for!”
As it works in the Internet age, everything from honesty to mass murder is prone to Arnab Goswami-level debate. Steve’s shocking rider too has spawned interpretations across the world.
People Following Steve Jobs: “Shit, we could have made some money.”
People Following Money: “Hahahahahahaha anybody needs a loan? HahahahahahaGoodInterestRateshahahahahahaNoPrePaymentPenaltyhahahaha.”
Brainy Mexicans:”Screw Steve Jobs, Screw America!”
Ever Flexible Indians: “We don’t mind driving cabs around New York City. If you so desire, we can also make it our passion.”
Smart Rahul Gandhi: “If Congress comes to power, we will declare India developed in six months. Problem Solved. Haha kiddos, India is Energy!”
Honest Manmohan Singh: “Theek hai, pehle kaunsa follow ho pa raha tha.”
Concerned Arvind Kejriwal: “Janta ke issues passion nahi hain, unke ghar mein bijli nahi jal rahi hai.“
Informed Khap Panchayat: “Aaj se koi bhi gaonwalla “Passion Fruit” ko touch nahi karega!!”
(Originally published at http://cynicallysane.wordpress.com)